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Monday 6 September 2010

How common are you?

I took one of those internet tests:
  1. Do your toddlers have pierced ears? No, but my prize bull has a ring through its nose.
  2. Are any of the doors of your car a different colour? Yes, I drive a Maserati Gran Turismo, so the whole car is a bit different.
  3. Have you ever purchased an item using the television? Yes, on my gap year, I bought a horse in the Peruvian Andes in exchange for a Panasonic portable.
  4. Would you know how to cash a giro? Yes, I would give it to my butler.
  5. Do you own a snake or a lizard? Yes, there are adders on my grouse moor and lizards at my villa on the Cap d'Antibes.
  6. Do you have tattoos over more than 25% of your arms? The family swords are stored in the vault of Edinburgh Castle, so strictly speaking that's a yes.
  7. Do you shop at Iceland? Only once, on a business trip to Reykjavik. Bought some whale blubber and a geothermal power station.
  8. When you go out for a family meal does it come in a bucket? Only the champagne.
  9. Do you watch ITV 2? What is ITV 2?
  10. Do most of your relatives live within walking distance? Yes, Great Aunt Maud lives in the west wing, Granny is in the Dower House and some cousins manage a farm on the estate.
  11. Have you ever been involved in a paternity test? Yes, it turns out I am 13th in line to the throne of the Holy Roman Empire.
  12. Do you enjoy dog racing? Yes, but we call it drag hunting.
  13. Do you shop at Sport and Soccer? Went into the Oxford branch once but they don't stock my usual brand of shotgun cartridges.
  14. Do you have an account with Kays? Yes, the only place I would ever buy my curling stones: http://www.kaysofscotland.co.uk/
  15. Have you ever been on holiday to a caravan park? We trekked to Timbuktu last spring and there were lots of caravans parked up in the town, so that sounds like a yes.
  16. Did you name your children after celebrities? Of course, famous relations like to be flattered, and you never know, it might just nudge their arms when they draw up their wills.
  17. Do you take off your top when you go shopping? A gentleman always removes his hat before he enters a building.
  18. Do you own a 50" television? Yes, there's one hooked up to Bloomberg in the reception area outside my office.
  19. Do you have an England flag hanging from a bedroom window ? Only on St George's Day, from a flagpole on the balcony outside my bedroom window
  20. Do you watch Jeremy Kyle? Never heard of the fellow. Is he a member at my club?
I think I scored about 18 out of 20. Can you do better?

1 comment:

CityUnslicker said...

love it 0 BQ has a knack for these things!